Women have many burdens to carry and it helps when the men in their lives willingly help them

BY ANNE KIRYA

JOSEPHINE has been married for over 20 years. When she and her husband first met, she was working as a house-help. And because of her demeanour, he married her. Josephine dropped out of school in P.5 and as such, her command of the English language was limited.

Because he loved Josephine, her husband took her to a tertiary institute and also enrolled her for a tailoring course. Currently, she is a sought-after clothes designer.

Josephine’s husband is a shining example of how men can empower women; one of the tenets of Women’s Day.

Forget the days when the woman was relegated to the kitchen. Today’s woman is a multi-tasking dynamo. However, she faces many obstacles; one of them being the stereotype that women should not pay attention to their careers.

Leila was always the first person at her workplace. Consequently, she was entrusted with an extra set of keys to the office. In the beginning, her male colleagues asked her why she had to struggle. “Why don’t you get married and stop suffering?” they asked. “Some of them said I would fail at marriage because I was never home,” Leila says. She also had to attend evening classes. The earlier she came in, the sooner she could leave for class. Today, with academic qualifications, she is reaping the fruits of her labour.

There are men who support their women financially, set up businesses for them, buy them cars and send them to school.

It is good to support one’s wife in these ways although, it takes a certain calibre of man to do it only for the welfare of his wife. Some men fear that after supporting the woman, she will run off with other men. As such, they have resorted to paying school fees for girls on condition they marry them after school.

However, some women have been blessed by being educated at the best schools and financial constraints are the least of their worries. In this case, you as a man need to put your ego aside and support her emotionally and psychologically. Her having a job does not make you less of a man. Rather, she would be glad that you do not resent her success. She who finds such a man finds a treasure.

Can I forget fathers? Most fathers educate their daughters today, which was not the case in the past. Women are grateful for that, but as the saying goes, one bad apple spoils the whole batch. In many parts of the country, and the world, girls are still looked at as a source of wealth by their parents. Consequently, if this is done to one girl, she will continue the cycle with her daughters.

The role of a father does not stop at educating girls. The behaviour of fathers towards the mother is a compass to how their daughters should expect to be treated by men. If you empower your wife, your daughters will be in a better position to know what kind of behaviour they should expect from a real man. Granted, as fathers, you cannot be held responsible if your offspring deviates from the path you have laid out for them, but no one will fault you for trying.

Although many men have succeeded in empowering their women, some are still living in the dark ages and forbidding their women from getting salaried jobs. There is nothing wrong with being a housewife; running a home is a trying task. But this should be a matter of mutual choice, just as it is a choice for one to become a career woman. Which ever your choice, a little help from the men is always welcome.